At last! It's been such a long time since I invented any new acronyms!
TBFoSAO = Totchi's Best Friend of South Asian Origins (is actually a race with 10% minority in M'sia, not really Totchi's best friend)
UHAW = Ugly Hairband Attention Whore
Put them together and you get a TBFoSAO UHAW! (try saying it)
You can't miss her because she's a senior of the unit responsible at the information counter near the business section. The ugly hairband will pop out and scream offensive things at you the moment you caught sight of it! Incredulous but true!
So of course, I'm sure you guys are dying to hear what this poor, poor creature had done to me. Well let me tell you! Be ready. It's going to be fun!
I've always hated her ugly hairbands the moment I first laid eyes on it the first day I worked there. I'm like OHMYGOD! Does she really think she looks pretty?!?
But although everyone noticed it, she was too oblivious to the ridiculousness of her hairbands that even five year olds are too ashamed to wear. But anyway, this isn't about her ugly hairbands. I just thought it's about time I say it: UHAW, your hairbands are fucking ugly.
Needless to say, she isn't very well-liked on a personal level. On a professional level, people have no choice but to work with her. I've heard of this before, and I had noticed that she went all out trying to 'be friends' with me. But at that time she was busy pursuing someone else. And whenever she greeted me, it was always a condesncending joke, as if reminding me that she was a senior (meaning OLD) and that I am a junior. I took them in stride, reminded each time how much I don't want to be associated with her. In addition to her lame jokes, she also has an annoying way of greeting me. As in, a slap in the back, the butt, a pinch on the side and pulling the ribbon of my apron!
NOBODY messes with my apron. NOBODY. Especially not UHAW who is a TSBFoSAO.
So because of these things, I tried to ignore her, but she kept getting in my face, and I was still quite new, so I tried to be civil. Until last Thursday when she finally went all out to show her stupidity.
I was wrapping when she came into the logistics "I'm looking for a stupid book" she claimed, nudging me against the machine as a way of showing "friendly attention". So since she wanted a response, I said "Maybe it's not the book, but the person looking for it". What I meant was the customer who told her to look for it, but she misunderstood, and if she had taken offense, she didn't look like she was. And of course I meant it as a joke! GOSH! I feel so stupid just having to explain it!
So after break, just as the morning shift were leaving, my Benevolent Assistant Unit Chief (BAUC) took me around his Travel section to show me a few things our Unit Chief (from now on Big Sister) pointed out to him. While he was piling my arms with books, UHAW suddenly appeared! She told BAUC that I called her stupid! I was like a deer in headlights, but when someone accused you of something so preposterous in front of your superior, it's your God-given right to defend yourself, so I did. (It was easy to do since I was taller than both of them hehehe)
She called me a rude junior several times and emphasized that BAUC 'teach me a lesson' and was basically standing around to watch BAUC scolds me, which he didn't, because she was so stupid, she explained the whole story and revealed that her argument didn't hold water. So although BAUC and I just stood there, appearing to be listening to her, we were actually just waiting for her to move out of the way :P. When she realized she was not getting the attention she wanted, she went away. BAUC shook his head at her and immediately went back to work without a second thought.
But the event shocked me. Like, seriously, what is this? KINDERGARTEN!??!
I decided right then and there that I hated her.
I was off on Friday and when I came back today she was suddenly all bitchy and trying to act cool. Lame jokes and all. About 45 minutes to closing time, I cleared the basket under our counter where we kept books of other units or other departments. I went over to their counter to deliver them. I piled them on the counter as I was taking them out of the basket (there were a lot of books). UHAW was there and suddenly told me to put the books on the trolleys behind me. I flatly said "Don't want", which, if I had to explain, was of course, a fucking joke.
UHAW took offense.
She indicated to the pile of books and basically blamed me for messing up their counter (which was already messy to begin with, which is normal). She told me again to put the books on the trolley, again I refused. This time for real because I didn't like her commanding tone. Then, she, out of the blue, said, "You're so rude, you know." She kept on saying that I was a rude junior, and I should respect her as a senior, and she was going to report me to my unit chief for being rude to her. I shot back saying I am unrepentant, she is not my senior (since she is not in my unit, I have no obligation to listen to her) and I told her she's a whiner and she said "Yes, I am a whiner." and admitted to complaining a lot. She said so. Not me.
All this happened while I was unloading the books from the basket (I did say there were a lot of books). When I was done, Mushroom Hair Guy (MHG) who is nice and friendly whom I liked, and among the few people who I get along in Kino, appeared, said thank you, and gave me our stray books in return. I thanked him back and went away.
Angry and still fuming, I went back to pack shelf at our huge unit. Suddenly UHAW walked past behind me and pulled my apron's ribbon. Pissed, I turned around, hissing "SHIT! Who do you think you are!?" mostly without thinking. When I saw her giving me a smug smile as she scooted away.
WHAT
THE
FUCK!
SERIOUSLY, HOW OLD IS SHE!? FIVE?!
I had to defend myself. She reported me once. She'll likely do it again. So I approached BAUF first, explaining to him that if UHAW ever complained to him anything about me, DON'T BELIEVE HER. I told him the situation and he nodded. BAUC listens, that's why I like him. After a while he told me to just ignore her, but I told him, it's because I ignored her. Ignored her non-existent authority more like. He didn't comment, but he sympathized and just understood me. I was so glad he was on duty tonight.
RAWR! I hate TBFoSAO!
Now, let me tell you why we, of a different unit, don't normally put books back on other units' trolleys, even though the books are theirs;
1) The trolleys may have already been sorted into categories. Putting random books will mess up their sorting.
2) Unit 2 has a thing for neatly arranging their books according to height. Unit 3 only recently.
3) It's not protocol. Other unit members are not even obliged to deliver books to their respective counters. If our managers could have their way, they would call a reprensetative from each unit to collect their own books. Which means, delivery is actually doing them a favor.
and 4) your counter's cleanliness is the unit members' responsibility. Other staff and customers may have their way with your counter but ultimately its your responsibility to tidy it up.
There. Such a long post already. And thank you for reading this far.
Ta'ra!
P/S Rei : (from Suddenly A Friend?) It's not workplace politics. I'm just putting a reminder out that I'm making a guestlist for my birthday lunch hehehehe.
Watashiwa-san: Can't help it if you're popular xD.
Sunday, February 21, 2010
Tuesday, February 16, 2010
Stupid Never Finish
...Or bodo sik abis-abis!
This afternoon, as I was getting ready for work, I was devastated to find that there were no clothes hanging from the clothing line even though I washed a whole load of laundry last night! It's devastating because I washed my uniforms last night!
So, still damp, I spent the entire time ironing them dry. It took all the time I allocated for lunch. By the time I was done, they were 99% dry. And the pants were cool at all the wrong places. sighs. What's funny is that before I went to bed last night, I was very certain that I had already hung them up. After my pants and shirt were ironed dry, I only had 10 minutes left to cook, eat, and get dressed.
I did all that, and even managed to leave on time! I'm so awesome.
...Until I realize once I reached the service lift at KLCC that I actually left my phone, the chocolate bar I wanted to give someone, the Julia Quinn book someone wanted to borrow from me, and my Nihongo exercise book.
Sighs.
At least I didn't leave my wallet and locker key behind.
Ta'ra!
This afternoon, as I was getting ready for work, I was devastated to find that there were no clothes hanging from the clothing line even though I washed a whole load of laundry last night! It's devastating because I washed my uniforms last night!
So, still damp, I spent the entire time ironing them dry. It took all the time I allocated for lunch. By the time I was done, they were 99% dry. And the pants were cool at all the wrong places. sighs. What's funny is that before I went to bed last night, I was very certain that I had already hung them up. After my pants and shirt were ironed dry, I only had 10 minutes left to cook, eat, and get dressed.
I did all that, and even managed to leave on time! I'm so awesome.
...Until I realize once I reached the service lift at KLCC that I actually left my phone, the chocolate bar I wanted to give someone, the Julia Quinn book someone wanted to borrow from me, and my Nihongo exercise book.
Sighs.
At least I didn't leave my wallet and locker key behind.
Ta'ra!
Wednesday, February 10, 2010
Suddenly A Friend?
Making friends to me is a conscious decision. Rare do I find myself being friends with people I don't consciously make friends with. If a new person enter my direct environment; i.e. my circle of friends where I am forced to be introduced, I decide almost instantly if I want to be friends with this person or not. If I am intrested, I will act accordingly; pull out the nice and friendly card. If I decide then that this interest me only a little, but I can't yet decide whether I want to be friends, I let them develop first. If I decide that I have zero interest in that person then I won't even pretend to try to be friends. In this situation you'll find me not making any effort to be friendly or even downright ignoring that person. I'll be nice, of course. Because if everything else doesn't work out, then you shall at least be remembered as someone who was 'not bad' or neutral.
Of course, I do acknowledge that I may be wrong about a person. That's why when I am not certain I give the person space, because some people take a long time to get used to new people and new environments. The least you could do is be nice. Being nice is easy. To be friendly is an effort for me. A relationship is an investment, after all, and I only spend my friendly resources on good investments. I don't want to be friendly immediately to new bloods because after getting to know them more you might don't like them, but it's too late to back out now without looking like a villain seeing as how attached the person has become to you.
When making friends I found it important to give the other person lots of space. I consciously decide to make friends with this person, so I will respond positively towards any actions that enhances our relationship; movie outings, eating lunch together, etc. But it's also important to me that the other person consciously chooses to be friends with me. If they are only with me as a second choice or because they have no choice or it was forced upon them, then I shall go back and gauge my interest level. If my interest level is high enough at the start, and remained high even now, I will make that effort. Like I said, once I decide to make a connection with someone, I go all out. Yes, I literally woo people to be my friend. Like all relationships, friendships can not work out and break up, or simply withers. But if all else fails and my efforts have all been met with a brick wall, I give up and pursue other things. I often walk away knowing I tried and it didn't work out. No harm done. Move on to the next.
Now the funny part begins. The moment I give up, walk away and cease all attention, the other party starts reacting! After turning me down and ignoring me when I was wooing them, the moment I turn the other way they grabbed my shoulder and urged me to turn back. I'm not an idiot for not recognizing such behavior. I know very well. Because I used to do the same thing. So I naturally, recognize this as a good thing, and took advantage of the situation. It was their fault for making me look like a fool first.
Suddenly I find myself at an advantageous position and was smothered with attention. My investments had paid off. Now, I didn't set out to be in this kind of friendship with those people I 'pursue'. It just confirmed my belief: people like to be given attention to, to be treated like they are special, to be appreciated for who they are, and to act all cool and aloof about it, even though inside they are swelling with pride. It's just how people are. They don't have to tell you. You just have to know.
But I also hate to be a trophy friend. I found it appaling when people I haven't talked to in years are suddenly name-dropping my name to get themselves favors or to present themselves in a better light when associated with me. Rest assured that these are not people I chose to be friends with. I have another term for them; classmates, people I know.
So. Suddenly a friend? To me that's a hard thing to come by.
Ta'ra.
Of course, I do acknowledge that I may be wrong about a person. That's why when I am not certain I give the person space, because some people take a long time to get used to new people and new environments. The least you could do is be nice. Being nice is easy. To be friendly is an effort for me. A relationship is an investment, after all, and I only spend my friendly resources on good investments. I don't want to be friendly immediately to new bloods because after getting to know them more you might don't like them, but it's too late to back out now without looking like a villain seeing as how attached the person has become to you.
When making friends I found it important to give the other person lots of space. I consciously decide to make friends with this person, so I will respond positively towards any actions that enhances our relationship; movie outings, eating lunch together, etc. But it's also important to me that the other person consciously chooses to be friends with me. If they are only with me as a second choice or because they have no choice or it was forced upon them, then I shall go back and gauge my interest level. If my interest level is high enough at the start, and remained high even now, I will make that effort. Like I said, once I decide to make a connection with someone, I go all out. Yes, I literally woo people to be my friend. Like all relationships, friendships can not work out and break up, or simply withers. But if all else fails and my efforts have all been met with a brick wall, I give up and pursue other things. I often walk away knowing I tried and it didn't work out. No harm done. Move on to the next.
Now the funny part begins. The moment I give up, walk away and cease all attention, the other party starts reacting! After turning me down and ignoring me when I was wooing them, the moment I turn the other way they grabbed my shoulder and urged me to turn back. I'm not an idiot for not recognizing such behavior. I know very well. Because I used to do the same thing. So I naturally, recognize this as a good thing, and took advantage of the situation. It was their fault for making me look like a fool first.
Suddenly I find myself at an advantageous position and was smothered with attention. My investments had paid off. Now, I didn't set out to be in this kind of friendship with those people I 'pursue'. It just confirmed my belief: people like to be given attention to, to be treated like they are special, to be appreciated for who they are, and to act all cool and aloof about it, even though inside they are swelling with pride. It's just how people are. They don't have to tell you. You just have to know.
But I also hate to be a trophy friend. I found it appaling when people I haven't talked to in years are suddenly name-dropping my name to get themselves favors or to present themselves in a better light when associated with me. Rest assured that these are not people I chose to be friends with. I have another term for them; classmates, people I know.
So. Suddenly a friend? To me that's a hard thing to come by.
Ta'ra.
My Goals
Watashiwa san: The metallic cupcake base is silver.
I've talked it over with my dad about my plans after getting my degree and of course of my endless dilemmas. My dad, being a guy, was quick to offer advice, which I didn't quite appreciate, and only made me go "why are men so predictable??". So I stressed to him about why I'm in this dilemma; I am lacking a precise goal.
Ever since high school, my life has always been about pursuing goals.
When I was in form 3, I obsessed over which stream to follow for form 4 because I wanted to maximize my chances of going into my intended course in university. My initial choice was accounting because that was the only non-science course we had, and I knew enough at that point that I didn't want to do any science-related things for uni. But I settled for Science IT because it was the easiest, and the abundance free time during the IT classes gave me a lot of time to reflect upon my future a bit more. It turned out to be the right choice for more than just the subject matter. Looking back it was as if everything was fated. It was scary to think how much I resisted it during my early form 4 months, and in the end...well, just goes to show, you can plan and struggle and fight tooth and nail for all you're worth, but nothing can stand in the way of the grand plan set in front of you by the Almighty.
At the end of form 4 I had a clear vision of my future. Yes, at the time when people were trying not to worry about SPM the next year, I was already making plans for after my degree is done! I get A LOT of crap for this. People think I was just tyring to escape reality (SPM) trying to over look the horrors (that was SPM) and onto the illusion of greener postures. ALL my teachers thought this way when I told them of my future plans. AAALLL of them. Except for the school principal, funnily enough. Maybe because she was a realist and knows my family background well. Still. She doesn't teach my classes.
Only my very closest of friends could understand, which was the only consolation I had. I must have baffled a lot of people because of my new mentality and if the teachers couldn't comprehend, what can you say about students, right? But I didn't blame them. I couldn't blame them. I knew from the start this kind of ideal will meet a lot of oppositions, and I quite welcome it.
What I was actually doing at that time, wasn't overlooking SPM or underestimating its importance. Far from it. I was just strategizing on how to use SPM to further solidy my paths to my goals. Unlike other people who studies everything and pray for the best, I was choosing my next destination right after SPM and see what their requirements were, and study accordingly. It would be insane for me to get 14 straight As, since the minimum requirement for a Foundation in Business in Swinburne was 5 credits including modern maths and English, and a pass in BM to get your high school certificate.
Which means, subjects I hate like Add maths, physics, chemistry, and Arabic can go to the dump for all I care and I'm off to tertiary education well above the minimum rate (since I got 5As)! See? graduating high school is easy if you play your cards well.
I chose Swinburne for a variety of reasons, but I did not plan to stay for degree. No, for that I was planning to take Business Management at a university in KL. I didn't just want a degree, I wanted experience living as a student. I specifically worked hard at Swinburne to qualify myself a half scholarship at my current university college. Which I got, and promptly moved into a hostel for a year, and the rest here, in our vacation home in BB.
So far, so good.
But then I didn't get to graduate according to plan. But no matter, because my next goal was to be realized; part-timing at Kinokuniya. I thought I would be graduated by then, but I havent, and that's fine, because I wanted to see if I would like working here full-time while I get familiarize as a part-timer.
Turned out I don't want to. I'll continue working part-time here until I graduate and decide on a full-time position somewhere. My dilemma was to come right after.
I underestimated how much I would learn from this part-time position. Firstly, I learn that I hate working for big companies. And secondly, I learn that I cannot live like the urban commuters in KL. And thirdly, I'm nowhere near to having my own nest, thus a bed.
After achieving all those goals succesively, I am left at a fork in the road. Realizing that my next decision is going to stay with me a for a long time until I get my business together, I knew that this was to be my most important decision to make yet. So after much fussing and panicking over, I decided that I need to make straight my priorities. Of which I have several:
My own bed, my own nest, my own business, a full-time work that I enjoy that I can work only 4 days a week, more time to do my business, and at the same time gives me steady income for pocket money and to pay my loan and also, to either achieve all this and stay in KL or settle back home. I reviewed several options. The first option can be done in either KL or Kuching. A full-time work (5 days a week) means I won't have enough time and energy left to do my business and hobbies as I want, but I will be earning enough for my nest, my bed, pocket money and loan. But I realized that's just living like a robot. I can't be happy no matter how much I earn if I can't endulge in my hobbies and build my business. That's the whole point of going back home because my earning potential is less than in KL. I'll be 24 then and I'm not getting any younger. My LIFE has just begun and I won't spend it earning like a robot!!
A second option (which I must admit I was partial to) was to move back home with enough money for two years' loan, ask for the new bed and nest as presents, and spend the two years indulging in my hobbies and growing my business. If, after two years, I can't earn enough just to pay for my loan every year, then I will go get a job. The main motivator for all this is sadly, not my business or my hobbies, but my loan. I told my dad this and he agreed. I should take advantage of the situation and grow my business and not worry about the menial payment of my loan. He said he'll help me pay for it if it comes down to it, but I adamantly told him I don't want him to pay it for me. This loan is giving me an ego boost.
So in the end I decided to go with the second option. Hopefully by the start of next year I could have all my time to myself. So until then I'm gonna be working hard. My goal after I finish this damn degree is to finally work for myself. It can't get any better than that really.
This goal is different from all my previous goals is because they have all been about preparing and grooming myself to fit someone else or something else's requirements. Eventually they are all about me acquiring the skills I need to build my own business, and my life along with it. But now it all comes down to me. Am I ready to finally take the reign of my own life back? Have I really learned enough to do this by myself, finally? Doubts will always follow the solo flyer. But I can say for sure that right now what I'm ready for is to take that plunge and find out. I must say I'm quite excited.
Wish me luck. Ta'ra!
I've talked it over with my dad about my plans after getting my degree and of course of my endless dilemmas. My dad, being a guy, was quick to offer advice, which I didn't quite appreciate, and only made me go "why are men so predictable??". So I stressed to him about why I'm in this dilemma; I am lacking a precise goal.
Ever since high school, my life has always been about pursuing goals.
When I was in form 3, I obsessed over which stream to follow for form 4 because I wanted to maximize my chances of going into my intended course in university. My initial choice was accounting because that was the only non-science course we had, and I knew enough at that point that I didn't want to do any science-related things for uni. But I settled for Science IT because it was the easiest, and the abundance free time during the IT classes gave me a lot of time to reflect upon my future a bit more. It turned out to be the right choice for more than just the subject matter. Looking back it was as if everything was fated. It was scary to think how much I resisted it during my early form 4 months, and in the end...well, just goes to show, you can plan and struggle and fight tooth and nail for all you're worth, but nothing can stand in the way of the grand plan set in front of you by the Almighty.
At the end of form 4 I had a clear vision of my future. Yes, at the time when people were trying not to worry about SPM the next year, I was already making plans for after my degree is done! I get A LOT of crap for this. People think I was just tyring to escape reality (SPM) trying to over look the horrors (that was SPM) and onto the illusion of greener postures. ALL my teachers thought this way when I told them of my future plans. AAALLL of them. Except for the school principal, funnily enough. Maybe because she was a realist and knows my family background well. Still. She doesn't teach my classes.
Only my very closest of friends could understand, which was the only consolation I had. I must have baffled a lot of people because of my new mentality and if the teachers couldn't comprehend, what can you say about students, right? But I didn't blame them. I couldn't blame them. I knew from the start this kind of ideal will meet a lot of oppositions, and I quite welcome it.
What I was actually doing at that time, wasn't overlooking SPM or underestimating its importance. Far from it. I was just strategizing on how to use SPM to further solidy my paths to my goals. Unlike other people who studies everything and pray for the best, I was choosing my next destination right after SPM and see what their requirements were, and study accordingly. It would be insane for me to get 14 straight As, since the minimum requirement for a Foundation in Business in Swinburne was 5 credits including modern maths and English, and a pass in BM to get your high school certificate.
Which means, subjects I hate like Add maths, physics, chemistry, and Arabic can go to the dump for all I care and I'm off to tertiary education well above the minimum rate (since I got 5As)! See? graduating high school is easy if you play your cards well.
I chose Swinburne for a variety of reasons, but I did not plan to stay for degree. No, for that I was planning to take Business Management at a university in KL. I didn't just want a degree, I wanted experience living as a student. I specifically worked hard at Swinburne to qualify myself a half scholarship at my current university college. Which I got, and promptly moved into a hostel for a year, and the rest here, in our vacation home in BB.
So far, so good.
But then I didn't get to graduate according to plan. But no matter, because my next goal was to be realized; part-timing at Kinokuniya. I thought I would be graduated by then, but I havent, and that's fine, because I wanted to see if I would like working here full-time while I get familiarize as a part-timer.
Turned out I don't want to. I'll continue working part-time here until I graduate and decide on a full-time position somewhere. My dilemma was to come right after.
I underestimated how much I would learn from this part-time position. Firstly, I learn that I hate working for big companies. And secondly, I learn that I cannot live like the urban commuters in KL. And thirdly, I'm nowhere near to having my own nest, thus a bed.
After achieving all those goals succesively, I am left at a fork in the road. Realizing that my next decision is going to stay with me a for a long time until I get my business together, I knew that this was to be my most important decision to make yet. So after much fussing and panicking over, I decided that I need to make straight my priorities. Of which I have several:
My own bed, my own nest, my own business, a full-time work that I enjoy that I can work only 4 days a week, more time to do my business, and at the same time gives me steady income for pocket money and to pay my loan and also, to either achieve all this and stay in KL or settle back home. I reviewed several options. The first option can be done in either KL or Kuching. A full-time work (5 days a week) means I won't have enough time and energy left to do my business and hobbies as I want, but I will be earning enough for my nest, my bed, pocket money and loan. But I realized that's just living like a robot. I can't be happy no matter how much I earn if I can't endulge in my hobbies and build my business. That's the whole point of going back home because my earning potential is less than in KL. I'll be 24 then and I'm not getting any younger. My LIFE has just begun and I won't spend it earning like a robot!!
A second option (which I must admit I was partial to) was to move back home with enough money for two years' loan, ask for the new bed and nest as presents, and spend the two years indulging in my hobbies and growing my business. If, after two years, I can't earn enough just to pay for my loan every year, then I will go get a job. The main motivator for all this is sadly, not my business or my hobbies, but my loan. I told my dad this and he agreed. I should take advantage of the situation and grow my business and not worry about the menial payment of my loan. He said he'll help me pay for it if it comes down to it, but I adamantly told him I don't want him to pay it for me. This loan is giving me an ego boost.
So in the end I decided to go with the second option. Hopefully by the start of next year I could have all my time to myself. So until then I'm gonna be working hard. My goal after I finish this damn degree is to finally work for myself. It can't get any better than that really.
This goal is different from all my previous goals is because they have all been about preparing and grooming myself to fit someone else or something else's requirements. Eventually they are all about me acquiring the skills I need to build my own business, and my life along with it. But now it all comes down to me. Am I ready to finally take the reign of my own life back? Have I really learned enough to do this by myself, finally? Doubts will always follow the solo flyer. But I can say for sure that right now what I'm ready for is to take that plunge and find out. I must say I'm quite excited.
Wish me luck. Ta'ra!
Thursday, February 4, 2010
On Hold
For now, until I finish my classes, Snackellery is ON HOLD. I can't even be bothered to make a paid sample because I won't be able to cope with the consequent orders! And you know it takes a lot for me refuse money when it's offered like that, considering how greedy I am. But this is life. And this is how my current reality is. I am so sorry to disappoint my fans, but until then, here's a snippet on what I had done last. xD
Just so you know that I havent been not doing anything!
Ta'ra!
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